Peace Corps

Holidays and Exams

It’s been a busy week out here in training-land.  3 holidays in one week, and only one day off. July 1 is Rwandan Independence Day [but it’s not celebrated].  July 4 is both American Independence Day and Rwandan Liberation Day, and for us, our only day off.  My fellow trainees and I went to the local hotel,  had pizza, fajitas, cinnamon rolls, and Fanta [or beverage of  your choice].  For me it was a welcome day off from the onslaught of language classes that the week brought.

On Saturday, we had our a mid-training language exam.  The target at this stage is Novice-high, but I have a plan. My plan is to score Novice-Mid, get put in remedial Kinyarwanda class, get extra speaking practice, and then WOW everyone at the final exam with my Kinyarwanda prowess. But here’s the real deal, I have performance anxiety, and I have had it for years. I almost didn’t graduate from college with my Spanish degree because I had such anxiety for my final oral exam.  And this was with my professor who I had known for three years, and was very familiar talking to him.  So while yes, I am older and wiser, but I still have so much anxiety concerning ‘public speaking.’


On Friday, I picked up my first tailor-made shirt.

On Saturday, after our mid-training language exam, I went to the talent show at my host sister’s school. There was singing. And traditional dancing.  And Drumming. There was a skit [in Kinyarwanda–I didn’t understand any of it], and some kid read the news.  And then there was ‘fashion’.  Fashion consists of about 10 couples of modelling different African fashions.  And these kids are stylish.  And they have real talent… unlike most of the talent shows I have been to  in the past.

Every so often, I see beauty in unexpected places.

Being Lost

I’ve been trying to finish this post for a few months now. I don’t think I’ve ever struggled so much trying to put in my words how I feel about fear. But I’m going to try, let’s do this…

Does anyone else have an annoying voice in the back of their head that only appears when it wants to cause you doubt, discomfort, or most importantly, fear? Nope, just me then? Fabulous. Hearing voices [just one voice ya’ll, I promise] at an age where things shouldn’t bother me,  and publicly admitting it?Even better.

You want to climb Mt. Kilaminjaro?

Voice in my head – you definitely can’t. You’re not strong enough and you’ll probably fall off it.

Want to go to the Middle East or visit Stan?

Voice in my head – who do you think you are? You’ll probably be murdered.

Think you’ll be a good Peace Corps Volunteer?

Voice in my head- You’ll be the first to leave

Dream of becoming a nurse practitioner?

Voice in my headyou’re a horrible nurse. Why do you think someone would choose you to be their healthcare person? Why bother trying? GAH.

Thanks so much, voice in my head. I really appreciate the support.


I don’t really know how this happened, but somehow over the past few years, fear and doubt have crept into my life in a way that I have never experienced before. And you know what? It absolutely sucks.

I used to jump into everything life offered me with complete abandon. Now? not so much.

I’ve hiked trails that are 6 inches wide, climbed really sketchy mountain, and traveled even when I had literally no money to my name, knowing deep down that things always sorted themselves out in the end.And for the most part, they did.  And while I had plenty of terrible travel screw-ups over the years, things always worked out. I have always believed that fate smiles on those who take chances.

But what happens when you start to worry more and take less chances?

Oh crap.

But somewhere down the line, I started to become more afraid of things that never scared me before. Whether it was something physical that I now considered dangerous or going after a dream that seemed too impossible, fear has set up its own little pup tent in the back of my head and made itself at home.

 

Age, I imagine, is a key factor. Isn’t that what people are always saying? You grow more cautious as you grow older? Well, I reckon the journey to becoming fearful doesn’t matter as much as what the hell am I supposed to do now?

Seriously, WHAT?

Do I just warmly embrace my newly found caution and fear, or try and get over it? Or attempt to strike a healthy balance between the two. I like to think I’ve always been a curious person. I always want to see what’s around the corner, want to know why things are the way they are, and am eager to try new things. For the most part.

However, fear has decided to join the party and often now gets in the way of my bigger curiosities. I want to see what’s at the top of that mountain but I’m afraid I can’t get there so I don’t try. Or sometimes I’ll compromise and climb a smaller mountain.

Confession – I’ve become a bit of a wuss. I’m afraid every time I try something new. I find that I really have to force myself now to try new things.

Oh how many times have I beat myself up for not fitting in. For being off beat and goofy. I’ve known that I was a little bit different from an early age. I’ve always skirted the norms of polite society and cultural standards.  It’s even harder adapting to a culture that is not your own.

As I sitting here, reflecting on fear and how it plays a part in life, thoughts such as I’m not smart enough, brave enough, talented enough, experienced enough, skinny enough, young enough, ect. Enough is enough.

What I am is a creative, passionate, loyal, loving, empathetic person. A person intrigued by life, fascinated by philosophies, and curious enough about the world to go explore it. I am so much more than the color of my skin, the texture of my hair, and the size of my ass.

Fear is complicated. Obviously. And even more so when it brings along its friend self-doubt.

Fear will always be there. A healthy amount of fear keeps up from petting the black mamba. It’s not a question of becoming fearless but learning to accept that fear is there, it’s part of your life and it’s not going anywhere, but it should NEVER be in charge or have a say in making creative decisions.

It’s time to be brave, y’all.

At the same, I’d like to think that travel has helped me deal with fear. For example, there are some things that never occur to me could be scary that I do all the time because I’ve gotten so used to them traveling.

The obvious example to this is the fact that I travel the world alone. As a woman.

In fact, I think that’s something that truly surprises people and when I share that little tidbit to folks I meet on the road, I am often met with skepticism and the usual “wow aren’t you afraid?”

But I digress.


Every trip I took taught me something. Every screw up I have had has taught me a lesson. I suppose in a weird way it taught me confidence, not something I have in abundance, that’s for sure. But I am confident with my ability to travel.

I learned to deal with travel fears early on, and now I need to learn to deal with my other fears, mainly the fear that I am not physically capable of doing something I want, like a hard hike or rafting the Nile. But also how to deal with my fear that I won’t be able to go after my big creative dreams.

I think people who travel are inherently brave at heart. You pretty much have to be to step out into the unknown, right?

And if I were truly a wuss, would I have joined the Peace Corps?  Would I have gotten on the plane to Kigali? Would I have left behind everything I know for an extended period of time. Probably not.

So perhaps, I’m just being hard on myself.

Pre-Service Training

For those of you who like my soul searching [baring?] posts, this is not one of them.  Stay tuned next week for more of that.  This one is about pre-service training.  What exactly is pre-service training?  Glad you asked.  If you thought, like I did at one point, that as soon as I got on the plane, I was an official Peace Corps Volunteer, you would be incorrect.  At this point, I am a mere trainee.  So what exactly am I doing right now?

Pre-Service Training [aka PST, but what I will mostly call training because I think documents with too many acronyms suck]

  • PST is the Pre-Service Training that Peace Corps Trainees [me!] undergo before being sworn-in as official volunteers. It typically lasts 10-12 weeks and takes place in the country of service.  My training will last 11 weeks and will occur in the town of Rwamagana.  ,Rwamgana is a city of about 47,000, located in the Eastern part of the country.  It’s located at 5000 feet above sea level [think Denver], and is about 30 miles east of the capital.
  • The entire 10 weeks of training is scheduled with the exception of Sundays.
  • Kinyarwandan class runs most days from 9-1
  • Afternoon classes include technical topics like ‘hand washing’, ‘pooping in a hole’, ‘making Oral Re-hydration Salt’, ‘lighting a stove’, ‘taking a bath in a bucket’, ‘washing clothes by hand’, and other exciting topics like ‘preparing your Peace Corps reports’, ‘grant-writing 101’ ‘understanding the Rwandan genocide’ [side note:  can anyone really understand genocide? I have visited Auschwitz; I’ve been to Bosnia [and other countries of former Yugoslavia]; the location or the ‘reasons behind it’, genocide is something I’ll never truly ‘understand’.]
  • There are field trips!
  • And chances to feel like kitties at the shelter [see ‘meeting the host family’ and ‘site announcement’ coming soon]

Essentially training is like going to summer camp where you know no one and being a freshman at college where none of your friends went all at the same time. Then you make friends, get a little comfortable, and then the rug is pulled out from under your feet again.  This is training. And this is where some people quit. In Peace Corps’ parlance, it’s called early termination, and it essentially means you resign from your position as a  ‘volunteer’.

In general, I’m not to suffer from test anxiety. In addition to the standard barrage of testing one does while in k-12 , I’ve taken the SAT, ACT, AP subject exams, GRE, MCAT, 2 respiratory licensing exams + one specialty exam, TEAS, an entire nursing program full of ATI exams, and NCLEX. However, the one thing all of these exams have in common is that they are computerized.  No talking required.  I very nearly didn’t graduate from my first go around in college due to the ORAL PROFICIENCY EXAM.  I have always suffered from a crippling fear of public speaking/performance, and while I’ve gotten better as I’ve aged [matured?], it is still one of my least favorite things to do on the entire planet.

One of the requirements to be sworn in as a volunteer is to achieve a certain level on the language exam.  It varies from language to language and program to program, but essentially one must score somewhere between novice-high and intermediate-mid depending on the difficulty of the language. The exam usually takes place in the next to last week of training and is essentially a recorded interview in the target language and is graded to determine a person’s fluency.  [Side note:  Google translate does not have Kinyarwandan as an option.]

Pre-Service Training concludes for everyone on the day of Swearing-IN, [for me, this occurs on August 14, 2018] which is a big ceremony with government officials and TV crews and fancy clothes. After taking our oaths we officially become Peace Corps Volunteers. Immediately after the ceremony we travel to our permanent sites and begin the two years [more or less] on our own. It’s an intense day.

And here I am thinking Peace Corps’ would be fun

Settling in

Days 2 and 3 involved getting ourselves safely to Kigali–an adventure by itself. Our bus was about an hour late getting to Philadelphia. Then the driver wasn’t really sure where he was going so he was on his phone both as a GPS and texting.  There were a couple of close calls where he tried to occupy a currently occupied lane, but we made to JFK airport without incident.

While yes, we are all legally adults, and have a fair amount of life experience, I thought there’d be a little more assistance in the getting from Philadelphia to Kigali, but nope, once we waved good-bye to the desk officers, we were on our on. We departed the US with 24 Peace Corps Trainees and arrived in Kigali with 24 Peace Corps Trainees so I call that a success despite sitting in the last row of seats on the trans-Atlantic flight [they don’t recline… at all].  Nearly 24 in-transit hours later, we were reunited with out bags, successfully passed customs, and were whisked away to the convent for our first chance at settling in.

You may think I’m kidding when I say convent, but no, out first two nights in Kigali were spent in a Catholic convent/ Jesuit priest retreat [thanks US budget cuts].  The nuns were nice, the food was basic, but entirely edible, and there were flushing toilets.  I call that a win.

First night in Kigali–in the convent

We spent most of the time in Kigali being herded around like cats, interviewing with several people about several things, setting up Rwandan bank accounts, getting an intro into the Kinyarwanda language [it’s hard], and getting up-to-date on shots.  Then just as we were settling in at the convent, we are whisked away again–this time to our training site which will be our home for the next three months.

These three months consist of a lot of language training and some basic ‘how-to survive in Rwanda on your own classes in health and sanitation.

Friday ended with us being placed in our host families which I lovingly call –being dropped off at the pound– since we were like little lost kittens anxiously awaiting our ‘adoptive’ family to claim us.

Mine finally did, and once again I was herded off to yet another location to attempt to settle it.  Let’s just say this week has been… ummm Interesting.

Alive and Well

Yes, I am in fact, alive and well.  I’ve been in Rwanda for about a couple of days now, and I have lots to say. Unfortunately, a lack of Internet and computer/electricity access has made it difficult to communicate with those of you back home.  When I get the chance, I’ll actually post some updates about what I’ve all been doing so far, but for now, rest assured that I’m alive and healthy, and have yet to injure myself.

Feel free to call/text me!  Or write me or mail a package full of goodies, if you really want to spoil me!

 

I’d suggest going through Google or What’s App. I need wi-fi access for Facebook messenger and that’s a hot commodity.  All incoming calls/texts are free for me!!!  But for me to call you, well, it costs a lot…

Stay. Don’t go.

Stay. Don’t go. That’s all I wanted to hear. We met for dinner one last time before I planned to leave. We met at our favorite pizza place. A place we’d been probably a hundred times before. A place I haven’t been since. All I wanted was to hear you say “Stay with me.”

Those words never came.

I heard the litany of excuses. “We’ll be together when you come back.” “I don’t want to hold you back.” “You were meant for this.” “If I tell you not to go, you’ll resent me later on” [OK that one might be true]. While I heard it all, I still wanted you to just say ‘Stay’.

In some ways, this was the sequel. The final installment in the story of us. We’ve done this dance and played this film so many times before, I should have been prepared for the ending.

I wasn’t.

Tears fell as I pulled away. Amazingly, I held it together as you kissed me and told me to go be amazing. I stared into your green-gray eyes, imploring you to say something. But you didn’t. And I can still see you standing there as I drive away.

I waited for the call that never came. I finished packing my bags with tears running down my face. My last night at home surrounded by friends was amazing. I noticed you weren’t there. Tears happened on the way to the airport. And again at check in. But once I got on the plane, everything was OK. Traveling was familiar-  like an old friend welcoming me back. It envelopes me like a favorite, much too big sweatshirt. Everything feels new and exciting, and that feeling is a comfort to me.

I called you after our first day of training. It was boring as most trainings are, but when you told me you heard an excitement in my voice that’s being missing, you knew you made the right decision. “I was so close to saying ‘Why can’t you stay?’ I’m glad I didn’t because this is what you were meant to do”

I melted. Probably died a little too. I would have stayed. And maybe you knew that too. And in a random act of selflessness, you told me to go change the world. Or at least a corner of it.

After so long together, I thought I knew you like the back of my hand. Turns out, I hardly knew you at all.

 

Last Night at the Hideaway

It’s Saturday night.  I’ve just work my last shift, and for now, I am alone. Blissfully alone.  I love my friends, I do, but as an introvert at heart, being around people is exhausting, and tonight, tonight, I am blissfully alone. Tomorrow night, I will say good-bye to even more friends. And to my kitty cats. But tonight, tonight I am alone. Just me, Lucy, and Molly on the prairie. On my last night at the prairie, I watched the series finale of  The Americans, my favorite TV show over the last six years.  How fitting that the series ended just prior to my departure.  Lucy, Molly and I curled up on the couch watching my favorite Russian spies.  So many things are going to change in the next week, the next month, the next year. In the words of my favorite characters, “I’ll adjust.’
I worry if I’ll ever learn Kinyarwandan.  If I’ll ever learn to cook without the use of a microwave. If I’ll learn to ‘live’ without the luxuries I’ve become accustomed to having. If I’ll make friends. If the people in the village I get assigned to will  accept me.  If I will do any good.  People say to write down your expectations of what your Peace Corps’ Service will be like, then crumple up that sheet of paper and throw it away.

I have never regretted my decision to serve in the Peace Corps. I first heard of it in middle school. I met a middle aged man who’s name I’ve forgotten. He was unemployed, staying in a homeless shelter, and lived with disabilities. He confessed that if he could play his cards all over again, he’d absolutely do this one thing: Peace Corps. The idea stuck with me, as well as the concept that I had more privileges than others, and the idea that I had a moral obligation to use my privilege to lessen the suffering of others.  And at this stage of life, I have the skills to do so.

Two years is a long time, but yet, it’s not. Life will go on in America; just as it will in Rwanda whether I am there or not. I applied to the Peace Corps in September 2016. I was invited to serve in July 2017, and I  depart for Rwanda in  2018.  Nearly two years have already passed.  The relationships we make in life is all that we have.

Saying good-byes

Fact: good-byes are the worst.

For more months than I care to remember, I’ve been preparing for departure. Preparing to say my good-byes to a life I’ve spent the last few years carefully crafting. All the government required paperwork, the new purchases that are a *must-have* [like a nifty head lamp], and setting up Lucy and Molly for their own little adventure. I have had a suitcase partially packed for 6 months. Who does that? A neurotic person who has prepared for not one but two different Peace Corps service stations, that’s who. Add to that the time I’ve spent researching Peace Corps | Rwanda and attempting to teach myself some vocab in the local language, and I have basically been making myself *slightly crazy*.

Ice cream is always a good idea

But I have not forgotten some important advice given to me from my Madagascar stage-mates: spend as much time with friends and family as possible before leaving. I’m looking at these extra three months as a gift.  I got spend Spring Break with my favorite little people. I’m continuing to work to save up money for adventures [maybe I’ll get to Madagascar after all]. I get to spend one last Spring/early Summer in South Carolina which is much preferable to the constant heat and humidity of July and August.  I’m going hiking and doing short trips with friends. Taking ALL THE PHOTOS for the memories and also for the house decorations.

I went hiking on the Cumberland Trail in Tennessee in May.  It was an awesome spur-of-the-moment hike.

Concerts on the lawn with friends

Took the little people to the zoo

Went hiking in the cold with the little people… they were troopers

We had much nicer weather on Spring Break

And then I hiked the Foothills Trail all by myself

And I got to see an amazing sunrise on top of Jellico Mountain, Tennessee

Basically, these last three months have been a gift wrapped up in a neat little package.  The little people and I have spent more time together.  I found out there’s going to be another little person come November.  I got a few more house projects done.

Enjoyed some picture perfect days

Made a Lucy-approved walkway out of patio pavers

Planted some flowers–hopefully they will establish roots and still be thriving when I return

This is the week of good-byes.   Good-byes to co-workers. Good-byes to friends. Good-byes to Best Friends. Good-bye to kitty cats. Over all, I feel a lot more prepared to leave than I did when I was scheduled to depart for Madagascar… Let’s all hope I can still say that next Monday.

Thoughts before I go

One month to go

It’s about four weeks until I go. You see, in theory, I should have something heartfelt and sincere to say. Perhaps a few final thoughts I care to leave behind? A legacy? A farewell? [Wait, I’m not dying].

But I don’t. I’ve got nothing.

I’m still working… being a nurse and all, saving every $ I can so that I can fit some adventures in during my Peace Corps service. I’ve packed, but only because I moved out of my apartment in October. When I moved, I got rid of all the things I didn’t want to keep. I haven’t done a lot to the house other than make it stronger to weather any particular storm. I’m doing a lot of overnight camping and hiking/backpacking. I’m crashing with friends. Molly and Lucy are in charge, so to speak. I essentially bought a house for the cats. They even have their own expense account so their new caretakers can provide for them like I have.

I have always been more on the private side; careful of what I say out loud, or in this case, put in print. Truth be told, I have very little that I care to say out loud. I, alone, am privy to my thoughts, as they are rapidly changing and I can’t seem to keep up.

Thoughts

I’m nervous. Of course I’m nervous. No matter how much I try to prepare, it’s still the unknown. I’m scared. Of course I’m scared. Even though I’ve done some version of this before, this is a unique period in my life.  I’m excited, thrilled even.  I know of no one in my family, friends, or even acquaintances who has been a Peace Corps volunteer. In many ways, this is everything I’ve always wanted. And in many others, it’s nothing I ever expected.

Of course, I’m saying this now, before I’ve even begun. What will I say when I am two weeks into training? How will I feel? Will I be as self-assured as I imagine I will be? Or will I be as the other PCV’s (Peace Corps Volunteer) say; wondering what on earth possessed me to do such a thing?

How can I, now, at this very moment, possibly make a statement? There is so much I don’t know. How am I to predict how I’ll feel in the coming weeks and months, when I can’t even get a firm grasp on how I feel right now? My mind is a chaotic whirl. I’m busy preparing for my departure, anticipating my arrival, and trying to juggle work and spending time with friends in between. Everything has been moving so fast, and in these next final weeks, they’ll only continue to speed up. I have a to-do list at least a mile long. I’ve essentially got to set up my life for two years so that someone else can manage it. I’ve got to get what’s need to apply to graduate school for when I return. I need all those addresses and phone numbers now. I’ve got to get friends to download WHATSAPP, and before I know it, it will be June 4

6/4.

D-Day.

My world will likely be flipped upside down in ways that I never saw coming. I will say goodbye to my home, my friends, my kitties, and my family. I’ll give up the creature comforts that I knowingly take for granted. And I’ll bid farewell to a community for whom my appreciation came unexpectedly.

But these are the thoughts running through my head. Every time I get in my car and drive around the country. When I am in a store looking for something I *need* for Madagascar. When I sit in my house and look around and think, ‘we’ve only just begun.’  I’ve had my house for a total of four months and yet it’s already filled with me. At night, with Lucy curled at my feet, and Molly by my side, I stare at my ceiling and convince myself to stay calm…

Good-bye my green eyed girl

Because I wanted this. I wanted the uncertainty. The fear. The unknown. 18 months ago, I decided I was ready to give up what I know in exchange for the adventure of a lifetime. The world is mine and my future belongs to me. The Peace Corps will test me, push me to my limits, and force me to rise above. I will grow and I will change. I will not be the same person I was when I started, but I look forward to meeting her in the end.

Bring it on.

Bring it on–Seal–is the musical accompaniment for this post.

Packing for Peace Corps | Rwanda

 

Let’s begin with:  I HATE PACKING. AND SHOPPING. AND WAITING. Add to it that I have already done this once when I thought I’d be heading to Madagascar [Read Every. Single. Thing. I  packed for Madagascar] in February. When I thought I’d be heading to Madagascar, there was an above average chance that I’d be living in hot, humid coastal environment where casual clothing rules the day.  So what I had packed for Madagascar was not necessarily appropriate for a mountainous, land-locked, sometimes chilly, appearance conscious Rwanda.

Much like any future PCV, I googled ‘Peace Corps’| Rwanda packing list, and found next to nothing. Very few Peace Corps’ blogs detailing an entire 2 years of service.  Maybe a lot of volunteers got tired of blogging?  Maybe a lot of volunteers didn’t complete their service?  Who knows–it still remains there are very few Rwanda-specific packing lists.

With that in mind, I’ve tried to create a comprehensive packing list. Comprehensive as in just over 5000 coherent words on what to bring to your Peace Corps’ adventure. Keep in mind that this is a  Pre-Departure List, and I plan to update [List updated September 2018 after having spent one month at site] it once I’m fully installed at my future site.  The format essentially reads like this:

Item:

Rationale:

Verdict:


What not to bring

Let’s start with what not to bring. Peace Corps will provide a twin sized mattress, a mosquito net, a solar lamp, one bucket, one cup and a water filter.  PC also provide malaria medication, general first-aid supplies, sunscreen, condoms, and any prescription medicine you have scripts for.  They will also treat any acquired illnesses so unless you just want, you really don’t need a full sized first-aid kit [Full disclosure:  I brought every conceivable first aid item available and even some that aren’t. I’m also a RN in the US, and will have to be damn near dead or have something unusual come up for me to call the PCMOs for anything.  But that’s me…] For those who are  going to Rwanda but not with the Peace Corps’, you’ll want to look into these things based on the length of your stay and where you’re going. Pharmacies in most countries carry a lot of medicines; all hotels have mosquito nets, and bottled water, soft drinks, and beer are available pretty much anywhere.


Money

I have a friend that says there aren’t many problems in the world that can’t be solved with copious application of money. I’d apply that to the Peace Corps’ as well. If you buy absolutely nothing new for PC from the time you get your invitation until you leave, and save that money, it should go pretty far in rural Rwanda [not so much in Kigali]. If you’re planning on bringing some cash, bring hundred dollar bills that are 2006 or more current. I’m not sure why this is, but Rwandan banks don’t accept the older bills.  Not little headed Benjamins, but 2006 or newer big headed Benjamins. Large bills, which most places define as hundreds only, get the best exchange rate. Money changers and banks will sometimes refuse bills older than 2006 and will often give you a bad exchange rate if they do accept them. Peace Corps recommends $300-500 and I think that’s a pretty good number, considering you can save some of your living allowance every month.  It’s nice to have a stash to supplement the moving in allowance especially if you are headed to a new site and have to buy everything.

A lot of places in Kigali and other larger towns take credit cards so having one or two is a good idea as a back up to cash.  Credit cards are also a good idea if you want to buy a plane ticket or stay in nicer hotels while on vacation.


Luggage:  I need containers to get my stuff from here to there

  • Items:
    • 1 obnoxiously large, sturdily-constructed rolling duffel bag [ebags mother lode 29″].  If you bring a bag this big, just know that it’s easy to go overweight quickly. My first attempt had this bag weighing in at 75#… ooops [Also, the handle broke during one of the many times this bag was moved during training.  It is essentially a 30″ high night stand now and will not be making the trip across the Atlantic with me–the bag is still functional for sure, but the draw of having a wheeled duffel bag was to extend the handle and drag it behind me… so while the bag is very large and sturdy, Rwanda broke the plastic handle]
    • 8 year old 65L hiking backpack that has already seen half the world.
    • Osprey Porter 46–a 46L bag with backpack straps that can be removed and carried like a tote.  This bag does not have wheels, but is otherwise an awesome bag
    • A tote bag–also a carry-on–In it, I’ll carry a book and assorted small odds and ends + my electronics and sleeping kit.
    • I also have a school sized backpack packed in the bags and another small canvas/cloth tote that I will use as a market bag.
  • Rationale: I need a way to get stuff from here to there.
  • Verdict:  I’m glad I have all the bags.  I hate all the bags while in transit, but I love having all the bags.

Clothing:  From previous experience, anywhere where clothes have to be hand washed over a long period of time will inevitably not make it back. I thought I was pretty minimalist when it came to outer clothing.  Also, it depresses me to no end that Rwanda puts a huge emphasis on clothing and appearance.  At home I wear scrubs, jeans and a t-shirt or sweatshirt, or during the summer–khaki shorts and t-shirts.  Nothing fancy.  Nothing stylish. I’m probably going to disappoint a lot of Rwandan mamas.

  • Item:  Fleece pull-over x1.  
  • Rationale:  Some areas get cool; some not so much. I won’t know until a few weeks in if I’m going to be in one of those areas.
  • Verdict:  It gets quite cool in the mornings during the rainy season in the south and even colder in the North. I’m glad I brought it.
  • Item:  Lightweight rain coat
  • Rationale: It rains. I won’t have a car so I’ll be walking in the rain.  Being dry is preferable to being wet
  • Verdict: I’m glad I have it both as a rain jacket, a wind breaker, and for covering my skin on moto rides
  • Item:  Cardigan x3.  One black; one silver/gray, and one orange.
  • Rationale:  It can get cool. These can spiffy up t-shirts and make me look more professional
  • Verdict:  I wear the black one the most, but do wear all of them especially on those rain-cooled mornings.
  • Item:  Blouses x3.  I never wear these at home.  Button-up shirts and bustiness don’t mix
  • Rationale:  I may need something nicer than T-shirts
  • Verdict:  I’ve only worn one of these.  One doesn’t quite fit, and the other is even too nice for Rwanda and will be going back home with me when I visit the USA next year.
  • Item:  T-shirts x7.  Plain, colorful
  • Rationale:  I wear these all the time.  Even to work.
  • Verdict:  I love that I have these. I’m bringing a few more when I return from my vacation
  • Item: Long-sleeve T-shirt
  • Rationale:  Sometimes my elbows get cold
  • Verdict:  I usually sleep in these so  I’m glad I have them
  • Item:  Hoodie x2
  • Rationale:  They’re fashionable. They have long sleeves. And a hood.
  • Verdict:  One is essentially a long sleeved t-shirt. I wear it to bed some, and around the house when it’s chilly. The other one is nice and soft and somewhat stylish.  It’s too nice for Rwanda to break so it’s going back home with me next year.
  • Item:   Flannel Shirt
  • Rationale:  Because why not?
  • Verdict:  I don’t wear if often but I do wear in around the house as sort of a light weight jacket.  I’m glad I brought it.
  • Item: Pants x 5.  Dark brown, dark grey, khaki, dark green, and black + one pair of jeans. Also known as hiking pants.  Also scrub pants x1 in dark gray.
  • Rationale:  I need something to cover my butt
  • Verdict:  I’m glad I have the scrubs, and I’ve already sent for more. I’ve already lost 15 pounds in just over three months and while that is good for my overall health, most of my pants are comically large now.  I can now only wear the scrub pants and pants that can be belted.  
  • Item: Skirts  x2–one mid-calf brown skirt and one slightly below the knee blue.
  • Rationale:  Sometimes skirts are more comfortable than pants
  • Verdict:  I haven’t worn them at my site, but I wore them frequently at training.  In order for me to wear a skirt it needs to be a special occasion or above 75 degrees. Neither of those have happened yet.
  • Item:  Scarves X3.  One teal, one burgundy, and one gray with owls on it
  • Rationale:  They can spiff up an outfit nicely
  • Verdict:  I ended up leaving these at home, and I wish I had at least one, and will be bringing these on my return voyage
  • Item:  Socks and underwear x a lot…seriously I think I have close to 40 pairs of underwear and 20 pairs of socks
  • Rationale:  The amount of socks and underwear I take on any given adventure is directly proportional to the amount of time I have until I need to do laundry.
  • Verdict:  During training, I took out 6 pairs of underwear and 4 pairs of socks and used those exclusively. Once I moved in to my house, I took another 6 pairs of  underwear and 4 pairs of socks and put them in rotation… so now I have 12 pairs of underwear and 8 pair of socks in rotation. At the 8,16, 24 month mark, I will remove the too worn items and replace as necessary. In reserve I have 5 pairs of underwear and 3 pair of socks for my COS trip.  I have found that the cotton ones have a much shorter lifespan that the quick-dry kind.
  • Item:  BrasI have 3 sports bras and 4 regular bras
  • Rationale:  I have larger than average boobs and would like to keep them corralled and would prefer do fight gravity a little while longer
  • Verdict:  I wear them everyday so I look for comfort. One sports bra is now too big. The regular bras can be adjusted.  I’m glad I brought the different styles, types, and sizes.
  • Item:  Shoes—OMG, shoes.  Apparently shoes are a big deal in Rwanda so I’m trying to go with shoes that are easy to clean and durable.  To that end, I brought or will bring back the following:  Rain boots.  These are mostly not necessary, but the only other time I’ve lived in a ‘wet’ environment [which was the Amazon Rain forest], I had a pair, and I loved being able to splash about, walk through mud puddles with reckless abandon, and generally not give a flip about my feet when it’s raining. I found an inexpensive pair on Amazon and will most likely gift these to someone when I COS. Trail-running shoes.  I wear these as my every day shoes [Shoe stylish I am not]. Casual shoes. For me, these are my brown leather slide-ons [treated with Scotchgard prior to leaving].   Keen Sandals I’ve had a pair of these since they first came out and I practically live in them in the summer months in South Carolina.  Teva dress sandals This model but in black… Flip-flops–generic, slide-ons that I got from Target.
  • Rationale:  While I could be happy rotating two pairs in and out, I don’t really care about cleanliness.But Rwandas do. And I’m trying to be culturally appropriate.
  • Verdict:  I still hate shoes, but I’m glad I have all the ones I have.  The Teva dress sandals were worn for swearing-in and will be returning to America. Also returning to America will be the Keen leather shoes. In its place will be coming rain boots and hiking boots. The Keen shoes are not practical for two hour one-way treks up and down hills.
  • Item: Pajamas X1
  • Rationale:  I’m not picky, but I brought a T-shirt I was gifted and a pair of fuzzy pajama pants.
  • Verdict: These didn’t make the cut, but I will be bringing the fuzzy pajama pants when I return.  Some nights are beyond chilly and with no HVAC of any kind, clothing and blankets are what keep me warm.
  • Item: Additional clothing:  Yoga pants x1, mesh basketball shorts x1
  • Rationale: It may get hot. I may not feel like leaving the house. I want to be comfortable
  • Verdict:  I sleep in the shorts and wear the yoga pants when I do yoga.
  • Item:  Swimsuit
  • Rationale:  I may get to go to a large body of water at some point.  Or a fancy hotel with a swimming pool.
  • Verdict:  I haven’t used it yet, but hold hope that one day I will.

Kitchen/household:

  • Item:  Knives/cutting board
  • Rationale:  Apparently good kitchen knives are hard to come by in Rwanda. I’m bringing a knife set, one small, a small plastic cutting board, measuring spoons, 3 measuring cups [1/2c,1/3c, and 1/4c]
  • Verdict: I ended up not bringing the cutting board and was lucky enough to be left a nice wooden one. The knives and measuring cups I use daily; the spoons not so much
  • Item:  Grater
  • Rationale:  I can’t tell you the last time I grated anything but apparently I will want this; it’s a light, flat, handheld one that doesn’t take up much space
    Verdict: Surprisingly enough, I grate a lot of things…carrots, ginger, garlic… things I never grated back home.  I’m glad I have one
  • Item:  Can opener
  • Rationale:  Opening cans without it is super hard
  • Verdict: I now have two, and have yet to open a single can with it.  There just aren’t a lot of canned things and most things have the pop-top
  • Item:  Stainless Steel Water Bottle
  • Rationale:  I don’t want to have to buy all my water and drink out of a puddle isn’t acceptable
  • Verdict:  I wish I had this earlier, but I’m glad I have it now.  I drink between 2.5-3.5 liters of water a day and it’s pretty easy to do when I only have to fill up my bottle a couple times a day.
  • Item:  Vegetable peeler
  • Rationale:  While I rarely peel vegetables at home, the water here must be treated, filtered, boiled, and you must prepare a sacrifice in order to use them.  I’ll just peel the damn vegetables.
  • Verdict:  I rarely peel vegetables… I’ll probably end up with a gut full of parasites, but peeling vegetables is a chore I cannot get behind.  I do however wash them in treated water, and cook or pickle them long enough that I hope the germs are gone.
  • Item:  Spices
  • Rationale:  Rwandan food is bland.  I’m no iron chef or anything, but I did bring salt/pepper, cinnamon, Greek seasoning, Italian seasoning, and taco seasoning.
  • Verdict:  I use the salt and pepper everyday.  And the cinnamon when I have oatmeal.  And Italian seasoning when I make spaghetti. Haven’t used the others yet, but I will.  Also I need more pepper.
  • Item: Zip-lok bags
  • Rationale:  They are illegal in Rwanda and I’m a rebel.  Also I use these nearly everyday.
  • Verdict:  I should have brought more.
  • Item:  Head lamp and other solar charged lights
  • Rationale:  The electrical grid is not reliable
  • Verdict:  I ended up bringing two head lamps and one extra solar lamp.  The electricity goes out frequently and my kitchen doesn’t even have electricity so if I end up cooking any time past 5:30, I’m doing it in the dark.  The headlamps are especially useful for the kitchen.  I keep one in the kitchen and one in the bedroom.  The other lamp stays in the shower room.
  • Item:  Seeds
  • Rationale:  I need food.  Hopefully the climate is conducive to growing them. They don’t take up much space
  • Verdict:  I haven’t used  them yet because I live in a concrete compound, and haven’t figured out exactly how to use them yet.  I’m thinking about taking one of my basins and making in a shallow, portable container garden.  I can at least grow herbs, lettuce [which is impossible to find], and maybe something like a squash in it]

All these items are in my box that is currently in transit.


  • Item:  Sheets
  • Rationale:  Why such an essential item is not provided by PC is beyond me, but nonetheless, no sheets provided.  I brought a gray pair that Christopher the Cat put a shred mark in, and a cheap pair I picked up right before leaving for $10.  Options include a single [90cm],  full sized [120cm] queen sized [140cm] and giant [200cm].  My bed at training was a single and my bed at site is the 140cm variety, but because these are expensive, I opted for a 120cm with a little space on the side and I have my PC mattress on top so I’m sleeping like the princess and the pea.
  • Verdict:  I ended up buying sheets here, because I found a pair I like and I have essentially a queen size bed here.  The other sheets will return to America with me
  • Item:  Towels
  • Rationale:  I brought a beach towel and a quick dry towel and an absorbent head wrap for wet hair.  I threw in a couple of wash clothes because they are small and lightweight.
  • Verdict: I ended up leaving the towel at home, but bought one when I got here.  Also I was left 3 towel at my site. I have used all five at some point.
  • Item:  Swiss Army Knife
  • Rationale: When is this not a good idea?
  • Verdict:  It’s small. I’ve used, but I haven’t needed it.
  • Item:  Sleeping bag
  • Rationale:  It may solve the sheet problem.  I may need to visit others.
  • Verdict: I also left this at home.  Camping is not a thing in Rwanda and the blanket I brought is sufficient for visiting others.
  • Item:  Down blanket
  • Rationale:  It gets cold and this one packs up small
  • Verdict:  I use it frequently and is one of the best things I brought.
  • Item:  Quilted comforter
  • Rationale:  It’s warm and homey
  • Verdict:  Even though this was a bitch to pack, and I never used it during training, it is on my bed now, and it is one of the items I am most glad that I brought.  I got a full/queen sized one of medium weight and love having it.  I almost want to bring it back home when I COS but it doesn’t match any of my decor and I don’t want to carry it around during my COS trip.
  • Item:  Pillow X2
  • Rationale:  I sleep much better with my own things
  • Verdict:  I am so glad I brought not one but two pillows with me.   I used one in training and now that I’ve got my own space [and bed] both of them are out.  Also Rwandan pillows are crap…either lumpy foam or hard as a rock with no give.

Office/school/work supplies:

  • Item:  Notebook [composition book x2], travel journal x2, and planner
  • Rationale:  I like to write things and the illusion of being organized makes me happy
  • Verdict:  I could use more notebooks.  Mine got wet and are now falling apart.  One travel journal is a gratitude journal I write in everyday [even if its only ‘I have a roof over my head’ and read when I’m having down days, and while I don’t use the planner daily, I to at least try to plan out my weeks/months.
  • Item:  Pens
  • Rationale:  I am a pen-whore and needed to downsize.  Also I like to color code things.
  • Verdict:  I ended up only bringing three.  I should have known better.  These are now in a care package currently in transit.
  • Item:  Medical equipment–pulse ox, stethoscope, blood pressure cuff
  • Rationale:  These are probably mostly unnecessary, but if I’m going to be in a health center, I’d like to have my own tools.
  • Verdict:  These are wholly unnecessary and will be returning to the US with me.  I’ve used the pulse ox a few times and will most likely keep in here. As I’m currently at about  6000ft, it’s interesting to see how my oxygenation is changing as I get used to the altitude. 

Electronics:  

My take on technology in Peace Corps is that 2 years is almost long enough for your gadgets to become obsolete, so if you’ve already got something useful, bring it. Having something like a laptop is great because it allows you to communicate with friends and family easily. You probably won’t be able to video chat on a portable connection, but just to be able to send and receive e-mails is really nice. Electricity is widely available throughout Rwanda and even if you don’t have it in your home, you can usually charge up somewhere in town or get a solar set-up.

The Official Peace Corps packing list recommends a transformer or voltage converter. Unless you are bringing small appliances, such as a blow dryer, you probably don’t need a voltage converter. Many camera and laptop cords have a black box on them which regulates voltage and says the range that they are capable of handling. Rwanda is 230V. Check your electronics and appliances to see if they’ll be compatible and if you don’t need a converter, you don’t need to get one.

  • Item: Laptop
  • Rationale:  I use it everyday at home
  • Verdict:  I’m glad I have it even though I don’t use it every day
  • Item: External Hard Drive x2. One is a 1TB drive, and the other is a 2 TB.
  • Rationale:  I take a lot of pictures and watch a lot of movies.  Also there’s no such thing as ‘too much storage’
  • Verdict:  One connection cable has already started not connecting so I’m glad I have the other one  that also has some media on it.
  • Item: Kindle
  • Rationale: E-reading is not my favorite thing, but weight restrictions prevent me from bringing an entire physical library.
  • Verdict: I sometimes read a book a day and this has been a life [and mind] saver.  Also you can trade files with others. I now have nearly 30,000 e-books.
  • Item: Camera
  • Rationale:  I rarely go anywhere without it so of course, it was coming with me.
  • Verdict:  I haven’t brought it out yet mainly because I self- conscious enough without it, but as I get to know people and as they get to know me, I plan to use it much more.
  • Items:  Flash drives x2 32GB each
  • Rationale: I’ve been told I’ll need them.
    Verdict:  Handy for transferring files, not entirely necessary
  • Item: iphone
  • Rationale:  It doesn’t work as a phone but with 64G of songs/podcasts, it’s a no-brainer.
  • Verdict:  I listen to music every day so I’m glad I have it
  • Item:  External speaker
  • Rationale: My laptop speakers are wretched. Rechargeable speakers are the solution
  • Verdict: See above
  • Item:  Headphones
  • Rationale:  Sometime you just need to chill
  • Verdict:  I rarely use them, but am glad to have them
  • Item: USB charger
  • Rationale:  Electronics need to charge
  • Verdict:  There’s no such thing as too much stored power.
  • Item:  Flashlight and headlamp
  • Rationale  Electricity is sporadic at times
  • Verdict: Late night walks home and electricity outages have already made these practical. The headlamp is especially useful if I have to cook in the dark when the electricity is out.  Also my kitchen doesn’t have electricity so  I either have to eat at 5p or use my headlamp to cook
  • Item: Rechargeable batteries
  • Rationale:  Apparently there’s no great way to dispose of batteries in Rwanda, so I have rechargeable ones for my headlamp and flashlight.
  • Verdict: They’re amazing
  • Item: Outlet adapters
  • Rationale: For my items that have to plug into the wall, I’ve got a handful of light, simple adapters.
  • Verdict:  Glad I thought of these

Toiletries:

  • Item:  Makeup
  • Rationale:  I’m not hugely into make-up, but I have an eye shadow palette, plus 1 lipstick, seemed like a good idea for any dressy events
  • Verdict:  I used it for swearing in and a couple of other times just for the hell of it, but I don’t even look in a mirror daily so make up seems a bit excessive.  I’ll keep it just because it’s likely to go bad at home.
  • Item: Deodorant
  • Rationale:  Apparently stick deodorant is not a thing I can get here.
  • Verdict: I brought 3.5 sticks. I’m glad I have them and will be bringing back more. I average one stick ever 2.5 months.
  • Item:  Shampoo/conditioner
  • Rationale: I’m sure I can find shampoo here if I look hard enough and am willing to pay enough, but who has the time and money for that.
  • Verdict:  I cut my hair super short four days before leaving and the travel sized containers lasted one month.  I’m now using my Dr. Bronner’s soap for shampoo as well as soap.  It works OK, but I will be bringing back one bottle of 2-1 coconut scented shampoo/conditioner because as my hair grows, I’ll be using more shampoo
  • Item: Soap.  I have both a bottle of peppermint Dr. Bronners soap and a very nice bar of  woody-scented soap that feels amazing.  I use them both
  • Rationale:  I need to be clean
  • Verdict: Nice bar soap has been wonderful. I’m not a fan of bucket baths still, but I’m a fan of my soap.
  • Item: Chapstick
  • Rationale:  My lips are always dry. Burt’s Bees is magical.
  • Verdict:  Yes, you can request these from med supply.  No it’s not always available, it’s nice to have a back-up. And some in every single bag and jacket pocket you have.
  • Item:  Dry Shampoo
  • Rationale:  For when I can’t be bothered to wash my hair
  • Verdict:  I’d never used dry shampoo before, but I love it.  It smell coconut-like so it reminds me of the beach.  It was really good during hot season when the back of my head would be all sweaty 5 minutes after washing it. Now I usually wash my hair once a week and dry shampoo it 2x/week.
  • Item:  Toothbrush and toothpaste
  • Rationale: I don’t want dentures too soon
  • Verdict: I have brand favorites so I brought some.  I also bought some Russian toothpaste in the grocery store and keep it in my weekend bag.  That way if I forget it when visiting someone, I’m not super sad.  I love my cinnamon toothpaste.
  • Item:  Nail clippers, nail file, and polish
  • Rationale:  Gnarly nails are not nice.  I’ll pick one color to take with me when I COS and leave the rest behind
  • Verdict:  My hair and nails have always grown fast and it’s no exception in Rwanda. I usually cut them every other week and shape on the in between week. I don’t paint my fingernails because it would do no good between the hand washing of dishes and clothes and generally just using my hands more, but I do like to keep some color on my toes.
  • Item:  Travel bottles
  • Rationale:  Lugging big bottles of things around suck, and little cheap baggies leak.
  • Verdict:  They’re small and mine are cute.  I use them when visiting other volunteers for the weekend and for the first 10 weeks in Rwanda. 

Personal/miscellaneous:

  • Item:  Multi-vitamins
  • Rationale:  They may be my only source of nutrients some days…those days my diet consists of potatoes, rice, and pasta.
  • Verdict:  I brought some gummy ones to supplement the PC provided pre-natal vitamins, and I’m glad I did.  I hate the taste/smell of regular vitamins so I’m glad to get a break.  In addition to regular multi-vitamins, I brought a B-complex since I’m not eating a lot of grains or eating much meat.
  • Item:  6 passport photos
  • Rationale: The Peace Corps said to
  • Verdict:  I only brought 2 because those things are expensive [$15 for 2 at Walgreens].  I then got 6 printed at a shop in Rwanda for 3000RWF [about $3.25].  They are use to establish a banking account, apply for residency visa, and something else that I don’t remember. But you will need all 6.
  • Item:  Purse and wallet
  • Rationale:  You need somewhere to store your cash and backpacks aren’t always practical
  • Verdict:  I bought a nice matching leather set right before I left.  I haven’t used the purse much… essentially only when in Kigali, but the wallet stays in my backpack.  Now that I’m at site, I don’t carry my backpack everywhere I go so the wallet often stays hidden in my house.  I also have a small change purse for the never ending accumulation of coins and small bills needed for motos and transit.  I am hoping to be able to take this on my COS trip and use it in America when I return.
  • Items:  Entertainment such as playing cards and bananagrams
  • Rationale:  Because when does a deck of cards not come in handy?
  • Verdict:  I’ve yet to break out my cards [other people have always had a deck too], but I play bananagrams about once a week.  It’s great for keeping up my English vocabulary.
  • Item: Tide-to-go pens
  • Rationale:  Stains are a bitch to get out… especially when you have to hand wash clothes
  • Verdict:  They’re cheap, light, I doubt I’ll regret having a few around. They have saved my life (or at least my shirt) multiple times.

There it is, my complete packing list for Peace Corps | Rwanda.  I am also creating two separate lists of things I didn’t bring that I want to bring back when I come back from my US vacation… this list contains mostly food items, but also things like rain boots, and a third list of things I brought, and either don’t need, can’t use, or no longer fit.

My goal for COS is to be down to the 65L backpack plus whatever bag I have my electronics in, and I have no doubt that I can do it.  I don’t plan on buying a ton of Rwandan thinks to take back to the US, and most clothing items will not be any good anyway.  One backpack and one tote will be much easier to manage than 2 backpacks and 2 tote bags.